HOO is Amanda?

Photo on 2013-10-31 at 11.45 #3
Kia Ora, I am Amanda,

When our son came out,  as it turned out, neither my hubby nor I were surprised but still it impacted us profoundly, it was very confronting when he was suddenly “out”.

However I want you to know there is a brilliant light at the end of the tunnel, your child is perfect – I know, I have been through this and I really do get it.

Unsure of how to handle  questions and family issues that came up, I realised there was no support available in Auckland at the time.   I started Holding Our Own to offer the support we needed, 6 years ago.  This is a long complex journey and we still sometimes have wonderings, questions and often still come out!!

We found that Josh’s coming out didn’t end there, not only was it a transitional time for him, it was also the beginning of our coming out to our friends and family.

As a family we have all grown and developed an amazingly strong protective family bond, as we continue to navigate this road together, we find we are all richer for the experience.  Josh is our wonderful son, we would not change any part of who he is, we are very proud and love all that he is.

I am a Registered Social Worker and Narrative Therapist.  I currently work in Child and Adolescent Mental Health .  I started Holding Our Own in 2014 and we have many families who support and have been supported through difficult times.  If you are feeling a little lost, alone, isolated, sad, angry, confused, guilty give me a call and lets talk this through.

Supporting our children means that we become a vital link in the chain of  change.

Come join our village

Warm regards                                                                                                                               Amanda

Screen Shot 2019-09-07 at 5.04.55 PM



2 thoughts on “HOO is Amanda?

  1. please help, I am at a point I

    dont know what to do. I have the most gorgeous well ground son who has just come out. I am so proud of him, but my husband who I love dearly has reacted in the most horrendous manner, and I dont know how to handle the situation without loosing one of them

    1. Hi Nyree, what a difficult time for you all. Your son is so blessed to have parents that care so deeply and to have such an open minded, supportive mum. Being caught between two people you love is awful, and in time the situation will calm down. Perhaps in time you will be able to support them both? I am sure that having raised a well grounded son, your husband will realise this is not a choice, that no loving son would choose to be in a position that may lose him his family? Your son will realise that this is often hard for parents and give his father time to calm down. It is very important to let your son know you love him and are supportive of him even if you are alone in this. This can be a dangerous time for our children who will feel rejected, confused and alone. This is not a time to choose sides, this is a journey and your husband is grieving his lost expectations that he had for his son. His response is fearful, sad and angry. I think a well grounded son must have learnt that from is parents? Perhaps your husband just need some time to realise nothing has really changed his son is still the wonderful person he raised. Please give them some time and please stay in touch. Are you in Auckland? You are welcome to chat with me on face book or email me on holdingourown@outlook.com
      Amanda (sending you strength and a warm hug)

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s